Nurturing Compassion

Buzz has discovered that when he has little patients that are difficult to connect with, showing them pictures of our little ladies often helps to break the ice and bring a smile to their faces.

Last night he told Sparkle about one of his patients. He told her that she was five and had blond hair and blue eyes just like Sparkle, that she had been in the hospital for a long time and was very lonely and bored. Her eyes got wide when he told her what it was like for the little girl to be sick and stuck in a tiny "boring" room all day with nobody her age to talk to or play with.

"Daddy, would the little girl die if she weren't in the hospital?"

"Yes, [Sparkle], she would probably die if she weren't in the hospital."

Buzz asked Sparkle if she would draw a picture for the little girl that he could take to the hospital and give to her the next day. She eagerly agreed and gave her not only the drawing that she made specifically for the little girl, but all the paintings that she had done throughout the day.

The little girl loved Sparkle's offerings and her mom was touched that Dr. Buzz would go that extra mile. Shhh... don't tell him, but I'm quite sure that what Buzz did would definitely qualify as more of a nursing intervention than anything else.

The little girl spent the day today making gifts for Sparkle that she sent home with Buzz before he left for the day. It was the happiest that he'd seen the little girl since he first began to take care of her weeks ago.

Tonight Sparkle got out one of her brand new Christmas coloring books, the one with fairies in it since that is what the little girl loves most. She colored one page and put her and the little girl's names on the inside cover with lots of pink hearts. She will send the book to work with Daddy tomorrow and let the girl color a page before sending it back for Sparkle's turn again.

My heart is swollen with tender pride. God bless this special little friendship.

This little beauty...

...has something she wants you to know:Translation (in case you don't happen to read 5 year old):

"Two of my teeth is a little loose."

Is it crazy that all I can think about is how excited we were when those teeth first came in?

We keep telling her that she's not allowed to grow up.

This girl just won't listen.

Thank you, Grandma and Grandpa!

The boxes arrived just this afternoon!

I'd say the stuff inside was a hit...

We love you!

Nugget for the day...

"Ultimately our gift to the world around us is hope. Not blind hope that pretends everything is fine and refuses to acknowledge how things are. But the kind of hope that comes from staring pain and suffering right in the eyes and refusing to believe that this is all there is. It is what we all need - hope that comes not from going around suffering but from going through it."

Rob Bell
Velvet Elvis

Snowed In... and Stir Crazy?

You be the judge!

Sweet cheeks...

We had an impromptu photo shoot today in Sevvy's room so that I could play with my new camera lens. I can't believe she's already three and a half months old! Sadly, I still have no photo editing capabilities, so you get to see 'em as I shoot 'em. Some of these are definite printers, just as soon as I can fix the color!

Special thanks to my Sparkle for her help... and for being such a great big sister. We're so glad we've had extra vacation time with you this week (school has been cancelled for the frigid temps these past couple of days). We love you!!!

Onward

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about what changes I would like to make in my life. I suppose I'm not unlike everyone else in the world whose thoughts are turned toward resolution. I have the usual aspirations to spend more quality time with each of my girls, exercise, eat more healthy foods, keep a cleaner house...

But more importantly, my thoughts have been dwelling on the state of my spiritual well being. I have been neglecting my spiritual health for far too long and I know that as much as I work on other aspects of my life, it does no good if I am merely dragging my soul along for the ride.

Many of you know the tragedy that struck in our friend's lives over a year ago. It was a terrible loss that made me question the very nature of the God that I had pledged to serve. It's almost nauseating... to question the trustworthiness of the One who must be trusted in exchange for eternal salvation. For a time, the only words that I could fling in God's direction were, "How could you?"

Last February, after experiencing the joy of welcoming my friend's son into the world, I felt my heart softening and was inspired to write this:

"I have faith that some day I'll be okay with God again. I know that he is patiently waiting for my human mind to stop attempting to wrap itself around his intentions and submit to his sovereignty. I know that some day I'll be able to stand in his presence and worship without reservation, that I'll once again be able to pray with the knowledge that his will is good and perfect. I don't know how long it will take me to get to that point, but I do know this: I am bound to these women in a way that only sharing in the deepest tragedy and the greatest joy can bring. When God seems far away, still I know that these friendships are his precious gifts. The love I feel given so freely from my friends originates from my creator, he is loving me in a way that feels safe to me in this time. And for that I am truly grateful."

It's been a long and eventful year. But slowly, mercifully, I have felt my heart turning once again toward my maker. I have been reminded that we do not live in a world that exists as it was created to be. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God hates sin and the effect that sin has on this world. The words of Hebrews 4, "We do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize..." have been marching around in my mind, doing their best to crowd out the thoughts of doubt that have been dominating my awareness.

I still feel as if I am limping along, convalescing perhaps. It's as though I've made it through the initial crisis and now have to do the work of rehabilitation. Where once I eagerly reached for my bible it now remains largely an act of determination to open its pages. The words of the song, "Going through the motions," haunt me. I've lived nearly 20 years as a child of the King and I feel many days as though I'm but a shadow of the woman God intends me to be.

My most earnest prayer is that this time in my life will be a turning point. May I someday look back at the darkness that has encompassed me and be able to say that I emerged a more tender, more committed, more compassionate follower of Christ.